Tom Pointed his Finger at Me
Tom and I were listening to a podcast about embracing one’s humanity. During the podcast, Fr. Columba was recalling his training to become a Franciscan friar. One of his teachers, Fr. Benedict Groeschel, would say, “If you try to be an angel, you will end up being a demon.”
As we listened to more of the podcast, Tom pointed his finger at me and said, “This is your struggle.” I don’t like it when Tom does that, but I really couldn’t argue with him. He knows me well and he really wasn’t trying to make me feel bad. Tom is very familiar with this temptation as well, but over the years he has developed a firm conviction in the words of St. Paul (Romans 7:18): “I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” Post-brain surgery, stripped of all ability to “perform,” Tom tells me he has no choice but to depend less on himself and more on God’s love.
Tom and I both love the scene in Ostrov where the Pharisaical priest, who has spent his whole life trying to be the holiest priest in the land, realizes he “has been weighed on the scales and found wanting.” He turns to a dying scrap of a man who has spent his life as a hermit, acting like a fool and a madman. The Pharisaical priest asks in humble desperation, “What should I do?”
The poor man answers him with a bit of humor: “Try not to sin too much.”
Those words always make me want to cry. It cuts to my deep-rooted longing to measure up.
Like the rich man who came to Jesus, having done everything he could to be saved, I find myself asking, “What good thing must I do to get eternal life?”
Jesus replies, “Why do you ask me about what is good? There is only One who is good.”
It is so like Jesus to redirect the question. With His one question and one statement Jesus flips the man on the mat.
The rich man was interested in doing good. Jesus changed the subject to the real heart cry.
“Why do you ask Me about what is good? There is only One who is good.”
Jesus knows us better than we know ourselves. What we really want is not a to-do list, but a relationship. Someone who knows us just as we are and loves us anyway.
Then Jesus tells him to obey the commandments. Back to “what must I do?”
“Oh good!” the rich man must have thought. “All of these I have kept! What do I still lack?”
Jesus leads him back to Himself. Back to relationship. Back to love.
“If you want to be perfect . . .”
Yes! I want to be perfect!
“Go.”
“Sell your possessions.” Give up your other loves. I am a jealous God.
“Give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.” In giving and self-surrender, you will find what you are seeking for. You were made to love! In loving, you will find life.
“Then . . . come.”
Jesus invites the rich man to come. Who wouldn’t want Jesus to say, “Come.” Come away with Me. (Song of Solomon 2:10)
Then He adds, “Follow Me.” Be with Me. Follow Me. We will have an adventure together!
Who could refuse such a call?
And angels, by the way, have a choice as well. Love isn’t love unless it is free.
So life is less about earning love and more about learning to love.
I’m so grateful that life provides millions of opportunities to do just that—to love and to be loved.